Top Ten Things to Say to Mean People.

Perhaps this post is inappropriate. I try not to be too negative about things. I have to stay positive or I'm shooting myself in the foot. anyway, take this for what it's worth.

My M.K. has a wheelchair. And along with a wheelchair, comes a little tag to hang in your car that allows you to park in disabled parking stalls. I try to be very careful about parking there though. M.K. is still small, and is usually carried into stores and placed in a shopping cart. I think there are probably other people who need those spaces more than we do. Really, any hardship of parking far away would be on me, and I'm not disabled. I admit that I occasionally park there if I really need to, but I hate it. Whenever I do it, I get the stink eye. Dirty Looks and shaking heads.

A few weeks ago, my husband parked NEXT to the disabled spots at the grocery store. He watched an older couple looking at him and talking angrily to each other. As they got out of their car and walked past him the woman said "You sure don't look handicapped." My husband has better people skills than I do. He calmly pointed out he wasn't actually even parked in a handicap spot, and that he doesn't park there unless he's with his daughter who IS handicapped.

When he came home and told me the story, I was really irritated by it. I hate getting evil eye, but for someone to say something really upset me. If it had been me, I probably would not have said anything back to them. I'm that kind of girl. I have no spine, and even if I did, I can't think of anything good to say till later. I go over it again and again in my head trying to think of that perfect thing to just...put them in their place. You know. Usually I just end up imagining so hard that I catch myself saying something clever and smug to the mirror. Never have I been so brave or witty in real life. This time however, it's a situation I'm sure I will face in the future, and I'd like to be prepared. I've had several weeks to think about it, and I've come up with a few ideas.

idea #1
meanie: "You sure don't look handicapped."
me: "Oh, and what are you suggesting that 'handicapped' people look like?"
It doesn't seem that anyone supposedly sticking up for the rights of the disabled would have a proper or politically correct answer to that question.

idea #2 (given to me by another Mom)
meanie: "You sure don't look handicapped."
me: "I would GLADLY give up this spot if my daughter could walk!"
Perhaps an approach of humbling them with the reality of the situation.

idea #3 (This is my FAVORITE!)
meanie: "You sure don't look handicapped."
me: "Thanks, neither do you."

I would love some more ideas. I thought that with your help maybe we could find some comedy and lightheartedness in the situation and perhaps come up with a top ten list of things to say.....So, what are your ideas?